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Showing posts from January, 2018

Where are the men?

I know -there are land minds everywhere you step. You aren't sure if you should say anything  - because it isn't your issue.  You aren't sure what to say and maybe you don't even want to weigh in. It is an uncomfortable truth that the bias has benefited you simply because of your gender.  However, in this moment and time, you should be part of the conversation. Otherwise your silence is deafening.

I realize it might be uncomfortable to talk when you have benefited or turned a blind eye.  But it cannot be any harder than to talk when you have been blacklisted, harassed, or assaulted.  Don't get me wrong, it takes courage to speak out in this current environment. Everyone seems to be judged currently even when trying to do something that could make a positive impact, but that doesn't mean we should stop trying. When Oprah spoke of those little girls watching on their floors as someone like them was speaking on television, it occurred to me that those little girl…

It's not a moment!

Leading the way in changing the workplace on issues such as sexual harassment, gender bias and equal opportunities is no longer a suggestion. This isn't a moment that is going to pass. This is movement that is going grow. It is going to be imperative that you are taking the initiative to make sure that you are holding your employees accountable for their actions. This can only happen if you have a culture that supports transparency and believes in holding people accountable.  Companies must invest in building leaders that support these beliefs.
In Oprah Winfrey's incredible speech at the Golden Globes tonight she said,"For too long women have not been heard or believed if they dare speak the truth to the Power of those men. But their time is up!"  She and many others are speaking to a call to all to speak out.  And not just in Hollywood but across all industry's.  This is a time to step forward make a stronger future. And we need everyone to be a part of that.  …

Dating sites???

I was recently asked to give my thoughts on dating sites and whether I believe from what I have seen in company's that the sites are helping steer those that might harass away from the workplace because they can engage with women online.

I have no scientific analysis of this idea, but I do have a lot of feedback from women and men that I know that are on dating sites.  And here is my thought.  I think that dating sites and even technology have dehumanized dating in many ways.

 I know, you are going to tell me that a third of all relationships start these days online.  I am not going to disagree that many people find each other in this way.  But I also have seen among my friends a surge in being dropped/ignored- ghosted.  If you aren't familiar, being ghosted is the equivalent of being stood up, but through technology.  You are texting, snapping, communicating with a person that you met on a site or even in person and suddenly they stop responding to anything you say. Complete…

Some of us grew up being sexually harassed and didn't even know it!

When I was growing up, I knew I was being sexually discriminated against by my parents,but I didn't really realize that the world was going to do it too. However, I remember as a teen being very indignant that my older brother had less strict rules for dating/curfews/social events than I did at the same age.  I thought it was a bunch of bull that he could come home later.

I also remember, being from Missouri, which isn't the South, but isn't not the South, that everyone called you sweetie, honey, etc. And we didn't think it meant anything,until you were older and men called you that and pinched your arm or your cheek and you got that feeling in your stomach that you didn't want them touching you.  
There was slut shaming and the idea that if a girl had a bad reputation that maybe it was her fault the boy did ______________to her.  There weren't any "no means no talks", but more "don't be at the wrong place at the wrong time", you don'…

Time's Up Now Movement

With the start of the New Year a new movement was launched with the hashtag #TIMESUP.     It is a call to everyone to stop being silent, stop waiting to report and to stop tolerating discrimination, harassment and abuse.  The movement is linked to a Go Fund Me campaign to raise money for a Legal Defense Fund and was developed by women in the film, television and theater industry.  But it is not targeted at these groups alone, it is a call to all women and men.  It is a call to hold our own workplaces accountable.

The group also looks at the representation of women compared to men in leadership positions as an imbalance of power that needs to be evened out.  Research shows that women in male-dominated occupations, especially those in male dominated work contexts are sexually harassed more than women in balanced or in female-dominated ones.

In my own career I have seen this to be true. When I was being sexually harassed 25 years ago by the VP of my company I went to my managers - all o…